Book Review · Thoughts & REFLECTIONS

A book review and a reflection: The defining decade

I know. I know. It’s been a while since I wrote a book review or a blog for that matter. I have a perfectly good explanation. I’ve been busy with work. Okay now that I’ve said it out loud it sounds very flimsy. Anyway…a series of events which the good Lord will call fate led me to read this book. It’s a serious book but It made me think a lot about the next ten years of my life. Don’t say that’s boring. Trust me you’ll need this shit.

So I don’t have a job now. Not the end of the world but its bad news that many have been through. I’ve realised people only like talking about the good stuff in this vain-driven world. It’s always the nice holiday, the sexy boyfriend, the spectacular food. I wish someone would post a photo of burnt food coz it’s realistic and it happens. Even in this blog sometimes I refrain from talking about my personal life but I figured what else is there to talk about if I can’t be real and ‘say it like I mean it'(you know!)And with bad news always comes the “what happened?” question. The same old answer can be so exhausting! I thought of making up all these stupid reasons why I was out of a job like “I was caught embezzling” or “I had an affair with one of the interns” or better yet “I drunk too much at the office party”. But lets face it, it sucks especially when you keep seeing all your friends ’employed’. And what beats being let go on a Friday?….why its being let go on a Monday! You probably have the whole week planned out topped by a LIT night around the town on Friday night.

First days are a bitch! I had a mountain of business cards which I thought of writing on with a highlighter crazy things like “GoT analyst” or “Feminist Miseducator” or Bitch-face specialist”. What a waste of business cards! But then you start looking at the positives like now you can sleep, have weekends off….the positives people. And for me that includes blogging and reading books. So my unemployment lead me to this book. At first I was like “I dont need this shit”. But then I had heard a Ted talk about this Meg Jay and coz I had enjoyed It I figured why not. I can safely say it was a most thoroughly enjoyable treat. It’s packed with sensible seriousness for the 20-something who has no clue that the time Is now to play, work and have a fun-balanced life while avoiding the stress of the future in style. It doesn’t tell you what to do but it gives you a clue on how to go about your own unique situation. It’s a good navigation especially for many my age who have just finished school, probably on their first job and without a clue how to go about ‘adulting’.I couldn’t put it down. It’s that epic! A few excerpts from it:

“Identity capital is our collection of personal assets. It is the repertoire of individual resources that we assemble over time. These are the investments we make in ourselves, the things we do well enough, or long enough, that they become a part of who we are. Some identity capital goes on a resume, such as degrees, jobs, test scores and clubs. Other identity capital is more personal, such as how we speak, where we are from, how we solve problems, how we look. Identity capital is how we build ourselves -bit by bit, over time. Most important, identity capital is what we bring to the adult market place. It is the currency we use to metaphorically purchase jobs and relationships and other things we want”

“Most things in adulthood come from the strength of weak ties”

“I feel like an incredible failure. In school there was a formula. It was pretty easy to figure out what to do so you’d know where you stand. You’d know you were living up to your potential. Sometimes I think I should just go to grad school because it would sound better and I could get As again. I don’t know how to get an A in my twenties. I feel like I am failing for the first time”

“Adult life is built not out of eating, praying and loving but out of person, place and thing. Who we are with, where we live and what we do for a living. We start our lives with whichever of these we know something thing about”

“Pundits and parents worry that marriage Is dead, dating Is in demise and hooking up Is the new relational medium”

“The art of being wise is knowing what to overlook. As we age, we feel less like leaves and more lie trees. We have roots that ground us and sturdy trucks that my sway, but don’t break, in the wind. We become rooted in the confidence that problems can be solved, or at least survived”

“Our attitudes and reactions are our last human freedoms. We may not have control of every situation at work, but we can control how we interpret them and how we react to them”

“For work success to lead to confidence the job has to be challenging and it must require effort. It has to be done without too much help. And it cannot go well every single day. A long run of east successes creates a sort of fragile confidence, the kind that is shattered when the first failure comes along. A more resilient confidence comes from succeeding and from surviving some failures”

“Knowing you want to do something isn’t the same as knowing how to do it, and even knowing how to do something isn’t the same as actually doing It well”

“Life itself still remains a very effective therapist”

“Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness”

Its a great book….anyway don’t take my word for it; please get yourself a copy. The defining decade by Meg Jay

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One thought on “A book review and a reflection: The defining decade

  1. I wish we could actually have you email to respond to some blogs. It’s easy to relate and understand and feel the words of your blog as funny as it may seem. Can’t wait for the next. Pretty surprised about the unemployment though but am certain something will pop up soon

    Like

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